Typical Woman?

I can be typical woman towards the men in my life. I am not talking about friends who happen to be male, but about my brothers and my father.

Bear with me ok, it’s quite a long story.

When my oldest brother got his first girlfriend, I really didn’t like her at all. You may even say I hated her. The reason for this was that, before she came round, I had him all to myself. It may sound a little naïve, but at the time I was 16 (he was 18) and except for his (male) friends, no girl had ever come into our home for him. So I was jealous. Jealous she had his attention and I didn’t when she was around, and jealous because in my eyes she was more beautiful than I. Why else would she have my brother’s affection while I didn’t have a boyfriend? Why else would we (my brother and I) be growing apart if not for her? My ‘hate’ didn’t last long; she came to my room one day, crying. Yep, so we talked and I became a lot more at ease with her, and to some extend, we became friends. My brother and she finally broke their relation because my brother got sick of travelling half the country to get to her (it’s a little country, The Netherlands, but it still takes quite some time to get from one end to the other, especially by train). Since they ended their relation I have seen her once more, when she came to look us all up, and after that she has visited my brother’s new place once. I was quite surprised when he told that she at visited him at his new place, and he hadn’t even told that right away. It was at dinner once, I don’t know how long after she visited him. But, I was just a little disappointed that I didn’t have the chance to meet up with her. She was/is quite nice and I very much liked her after that talk of ours.

Does this have a point? Yes it does. Bear with me, please.

My father has been married once before, before he met my mother. They were married for 8 years and the brake up wasn’t sweet from what I understand. It was hell. It was blood and murder (figurative speaking of course). Thank God no children were involved.
And after a period of 25 years, they finally decided they wanted to come together to meet up, and talk to each other, exchanging photo’s and things they still had of one another. This was arranged through my aunt, who sometimes came/comes in contact with the ex.
So, my father and his ex had a meeting once more, today. Their third meeting. It seems her children are very interested in my father, who he is, what he looks like. And she apparently is interested in us children. So, during dinner my father asked if we (my little brother of 19, and I) were just as curious at his ex, as her children were at him. My little brother had a very sensible view to the situation; he just wasn’t interested in her children or in her, who they are, and what they all look like. It also didn’t bother him that they were meeting. If my father wanted to meet her, fine with him.
It bothers me though, just a bit. I don’t want to meet her or her husband. I am not interested what se looks like (it’s enough I know she is Surinamese), and who she is. Neither am I interested in her children. It didn’t bother me that they wanted to talk things over, that they wanted to catch up with one another. It really didn’t bother me that they had a second meeting. But the third? It seems to be that she has grasped control over my father (perhaps once more); it seems to me that when they meet, he is chasing after her (every time they meet, he has the longest drive); it seems to me that she holds all the power in hands.
My father thought that I had a very feminine view to the situation (and was surprised), and that I was seeing his ex as an opponent. I am not; at least I don’t think so. He said that if it didn’t bother him, meeting a friend and doing more for that meeting than she, than who cares? Ok, that’s fair, but can she not come to where we life, instead of him driving each single time to her? My father was late for dinner tonight, because he was held up in a file/traffic-jam after he had met her. I wonder if she had the same problem, I doubt it.
Further more, it bothers me that he has seen this woman now for three times, when he hasn’t seen his true friends once this whole year.
I was told that his ex was so interested in us that my mother suggested celebrating my father’s birthday (he hasn’t done that for quite some time now), so that she can all meet us, and his brothers and sisters who she also wanted to see. I don’t want to meet her, I don’t have the urge, and I don’t feel the need.
Am I being typical woman? Am I defending my mother who hasn’t have a problem with the meetings, except for the fact that she too thinks his ex has to come this way for once, instead of him that way? Am I sticking up for my father’s best interest with my opinion she for once has the longer drive?
Or am I just being typical, and as with my brother, see these meetings more and more as an invasion of my territory? Do I think she is stealing my father’s attention from me? I don’t think so. But hey, it could just as well be true. Maybe, I am just not very good at sharing my brothers and father.